


Josh has not knocked Tyler up

by SoloChaos



Series: Shitty Werewolf AU [7]
Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Hormones, Humor, M/M, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-28
Updated: 2014-02-28
Packaged: 2018-01-14 00:53:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1246591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoloChaos/pseuds/SoloChaos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>no seriously. he hasn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Josh has not knocked Tyler up

"You're kind of being a bitch," Josh tells Tyler.  
  
"Fuck you," Tyler says from where he's sprawled out on the kitchen table. "Get me more food."  
  
"You've eaten kind of a lot already," Josh comments. Tyler sits up, glaring angrily.  
  
"Are you calling me fat?" he demands.  
  
"No, no," Josh says, holding up his hands. "I'm just saying that you've eaten a lot."  
  
"You're calling me fat," Tyler says indignantly, rolling off the table. "My _god."_  
  
"I'm not calling you fat," Josh insists.  
  
"What, are you saying that I should lose weight?" Tyler demands.  
  
"No! What are you talking about?"  
  
"You think that I'm _fat!"_  
  
"What?"  
  
"Leave me alone, Josh! You're so demanding!"  
  
Tyler heads in the direction of the refrigerator while Josh sits down, wondering what the hell just happened.

 

* * *

  
  
Tyler starts to go through a cycle that consists of eating, wanting sex, yelling at Josh, eating, crying about his weight, yelling at Josh, eating, wanting sex, yelling at Josh, repeat.  
  
Josh would swear Tyler's on his period (if dudes could get periods), but when he asked Tyler, he screamed at Josh for twenty minutes straight before bursting into tears.  
  
Josh does his best to hold his tongue from then on.

 

* * *

  
  
Something about Tyler smells off. It's rather confusing for Josh.  
  
He made the mistake of asking Tyler why he smells different.  
  
"I DON'T _KNOW_ WHY I SMELL "DIFFERENT" JOSHUA! I'M JUST A STUPID HUMAN! JESUS CHRIST!"  
  
Josh didn't have sex for three days after that.

 

* * *

  
  
Josh finally goes to Spencer for help.  
  
"Are you sure he can't get pregnant?" Josh asks.  
  
"Why, hello Josh, yes, I'm well. And you?" Spencer says, voice retaining every bit of its sarcasm despite the phone.  
  
"Sorry," Josh apologizes. "I'm just worried."  
  
"Did you take the 'no pregnancy' to mean 'no condom?'"  
  
Josh splutters a little. "No! No!" Spencer's silence says it all. "Maybe?"  
  
"I've been there too," Spencer informs him. "You can't lie."  
  
"But can Tyler get pregnant?" Josh asks, swooping back to the original question.  
  
"No," Spencer says. He pauses. "Unless Brendon's infertile."  
  
Josh goes very still. "What."  
  
"Oh my god, did you knock up Tyler?" Spencer sounds far too delighted. "Brendon, Josh knocked up Tyler!"  
  
"I need to call Pete!" Josh hears Brendon yell.  
  
"Ohmygod," Josh gets out.  
  
"This is amazing," Spencer says.  
  
"My god," Josh says weakly, clutching his phone.  
  
"Josh?" Spencer says.  
  
"Oh, god."  
  
"Hey, deep breaths, buddy," Spencer instructs.  
  
"Gah," Josh says descriptively.  
  
"This is amazing," Brendon cackles in the background.  
  
Josh whimpers.  
  
"Bren, I think I broke him," Spencer says.

 

* * *

  
  
That night, while Tyler lies asleep, Josh hesitantly puts his head to his mate's stomach.  
  
He doesn't hear anything, but it doesn't mean that there's nothing there.  
  
He doesn't sleep very soundly that night.  
  


* * *

  
  
The next morning, Josh calls his mother.  
  
"Mom," Josh tries to begin.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Um... Mom," he tries again.  
  
"Josh?" his mom asks.  
  
"I... uh." He rubs the back of his neck. "I think I... um."  
  
"Yes?" Josh's mom says, starting to sound a little impatient.  
  
"I... I-IthinkIgotTylerpregnant," Josh stammers.  
  
There's a long moment of silence.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I think I got him pregnant," Josh says, wincing.  
  
His mom bursts out laughing.  
  
"Hey! Mom!" Josh yelps. "This is serious!"  
  
"Right, right," his mom says, sobering a little. "You think you knocked your boyfriend up?"  
  
"Are you mocking me?" Josh demands.  
  
"Always, my son."  
  
He sighs. "He's just been having these weird mood swings lately."  
  
"Is that it?" she asks.  
  
"Well, this morning he kissed me awake, ate nearly an entire box of cereal, yelled at me for not stopping him, and fell back asleep. And that all took about eight minutes."  
  
"Oh." His mom pauses. "Josh, did you sleep with him during mating season?"  
  
"Oh my god."  
  
"Josh."  
  
"...yes."  
  
"Josh, sweetheart, you did not get your boyfriend pregnant," his mom tells him, still sounding rather amused.  
  
"But-"  
  
"He's adjusting to the hormones from being a werewolf's mate," his mom says patiently.  
  
"Oh." Josh frowns. "Will it ever stop?"  
  
His mom laughs. "It'll probably last about two-to-three weeks."  
  
"Oh, thank god."

 

* * *

  
  
Tyler finally stopped being all hormonal and then he and Josh done sex.

 

**Author's Note:**

> the ending


End file.
